beat_this_program

I have worked for a successful, thriving, company for several years now and earned over $15,000 worth of profit sharing. The problem is i have $9,000.00 worth of credit card debt. I was thinking about quitting the company i work for then use the profit sharing to get out of Credit card Debt! Just can't stand being in Debt,..can use that money and feed into a saving and retirement account. Always nice to have money saved up for a rainy day or if something were to ever happen then have the means to do something about it. So, my question to you. Is it a smart move to get out Credit card Debt by using your profit sharing?

Hey My Sexy,

Great to hear from you again. I hope this weekend is enjoyable for you. Nice to hear the interest generated by your newspaper ad has lead to a sale. And, it is always nice when closets get freed of clutter. I feel the same way, and myself even have another few loads to Goodwill. I've got a stash of cardboard boxes I will bring on March 3rd, to help with the move.

Nessa and I are doing better today, still a little sick. Thanks for your sentiments of well wishes. Got a lot done since this last email. Being sick hasn't stopped me (or Nessa). Nessa & I went to Home Depot & got some shelves, which I installed on the wall where the stairs meet the lower level (along the same wall as the fireplace.) I used anchors rated up to 50lbs, and piled books onto them. In doing so this has freed up more space, and the shelves themselves look quite nice since the woodtone pretty much matches the trim.

I went ahead and painted the bathroom last night. The color is called "Porcelain Peach." In fact the funny thing is it matches the sink exactly, even though I had no intentions to match anything. It actually looks so much cleaner in there with the fresh coat of paint... several years of splashes, toothpaste, shampoo, had made the walls all spotty looking. The satin finish will be easier to wipe clean than the original flat paint. I even got fresh new faceplates for the outlets/switch in there since I spattered the old ones, and new ones were only 44 cents. I do in fact need to reapply a second coat to some parts of the bathroom-- I only got a quart, and it was not enough to do everything plus a second coat, so this morning during our Home Depot trip I picked up another quart.

Today I hope to also begin painting on your room. The spackle in the torn out anchor holes has dried and I already sanded it. I think the paint will probably make a big difference, the walls in there are pretty dingy. I think the doors of your closet are pretty much beyond repair. Not only have the downstairs closet doors been removed, I also pulled down the ones in mine/Nessa's room and replaced it with a double curtain (after it fell on me when I gently leaned on it while painting). So probably we might want to take down your doors too--one half won't even bend to close. Then hopefully we can just take them all to the landfill one day.

Will be thinking of you. Will catch up with you later. Have a great & special day!

Love Pumpkin

Hey My Sexy,

Great to hear from you again. I hope this weekend is enjoyable for you. Nice to hear the interest generated by your newspaper ad has lead to a sale. And, it is always nice when closets get freed of clutter. I feel the same way, and myself even have another few loads to Goodwill. I've got a stash of cardboard boxes I will bring on March 3rd, to help with the move.

Nessa and I are doing better today, still a little sick. Thanks for your sentiments of well wishes. Got a lot done since this last email. Being sick hasn't stopped me (or Nessa). Nessa & I went to Home Depot & got some shelves, which I installed on the wall where the stairs meet the lower level (along the same wall as the fireplace.) I used anchors rated up to 50lbs, and piled books onto them. In doing so this has freed up more space, and the shelves themselves look quite nice since the woodtone pretty much matches the trim.

I went ahead and painted the bathroom last night. The color is called "Porcelain Peach." In fact the funny thing is it matches the sink exactly, even though I had no intentions to match anything. It actually looks so much cleaner in there with the fresh coat of paint... several years of splashes, toothpaste, shampoo, had made the walls all spotty looking. The satin finish will be easier to wipe clean than the original flat paint. I even got fresh new faceplates for the outlets/switch in there since I spattered the old ones, and new ones were only 44 cents. I do in fact need to reapply a second coat to some parts of the bathroom-- I only got a quart, and it was not enough to do everything plus a second coat, so this morning during our Home Depot trip I picked up another quart.

Today I hope to also begin painting on your room. The spackle in the torn out anchor holes has dried and I already sanded it. I think the paint will probably make a big difference, the walls in there are pretty dingy. I think the doors of your closet are pretty much beyond repair. Not only have the downstairs closet doors been removed, I also pulled down the ones in mine/Nessa's room and replaced it with a double curtain (after it fell on me when I gently leaned on it while painting). So probably we might want to take down your doors too--one half won't even bend to close. Then hopefully we can just take them all to the landfill one day.

Will be thinking of you. Will catch up with you later. Have a great & special day!

Love Pumpkin

Hello Super Sexy,

Thanks for your reply. I am so happy to hear your neck problem is better.

Today I had to stay home from work because Nessa woke up ill with a fever. By about 9:00am I was also pretty sick, so we've both laid around much of the day. Sore throat & aches, sore eyeballs, nothing too major. We were well enough to make a run to Biscuitville and get a late breakfast nonetheless.

While at home one of the repair people came by and fixed the upstairs sink. The problem with both the oven and dishwasher were both determined, but the man who came did not have the tools to fix. The diswasher's "drain solenoid" is stuck open, thereby letting all the wash water out instead of keeping it inside the chamber for the wash cycle. And as imagined, the problem with the oven is indeed the thermostat. He said they might have to bring a new oven because the cost to repair this one is more than the oven is worth. That would be awesome to get a new one.

I've taken down the shelves & vanity cabinet from your new room and have patched the holes in the wall, to prep for painting. I patched some holes in the bathroom as well where an old towel bar used to be that I took down when I moved in (to make room for the over-toilet organizer.) I think a new towel bar in the bathroom will not be needed because I've gotten hooks for towels that hang over mine & Nessa's bedroom door. That also keeps the towels separate for sanitary reasons (not that anybody is dirty, but it is always nice to have a towel to yourself.)

I am still working on the organization of downstairs-- Nessa has a lot of toys & art supplies, and I have more books than I realized. I have moved stuff around several times to negotiate what might be the final layout. I think ultimately I will have to get some shelving for the overflow, which I picture being on the wall where the stairs meet, being out of the way of the main living space. The shared closet spaces downstairs are fully organized and I have 1/3 to 1/2 of the space opened up for your belongings.

I am particularly happy with Nessa/my room, in fact I can hardly resist laying on the bed everytime I go in there and just take in the sense of relaxation. The pink color has a suprisingly strong relaxing effect. I made some "curtain" pieces from fabric to cover the front of one of the white pressboard organizers, and I might make curtains for the other ones too. I'm going to get another picture frame or too for some of Nessa's artwork and photos, as opposed to thumbtacking them to the wall as I had done previously. It looks neater when the art is actually in frames. Hope to make a trip to Home Depot or Lowe's sometime this weekend.

Anyway, there is the update of how the house is going, and I hope you've had a nice day. I guess it is your day off? Well, looking forward to hearing how you are doing. Miss you a lot.

Love Pumpkin

Hello Super Sexy,

Thanks for your reply. I am so happy to hear your neck problem is better.

Today I had to stay home from work because Nessa woke up ill with a fever. By about 9:00am I was also pretty sick, so we've both laid around much of the day. Sore throat & aches, sore eyeballs, nothing too major. We were well enough to make a run to Biscuitville and get a late breakfast nonetheless.

While at home one of the repair people came by and fixed the upstairs sink. The problem with both the oven and dishwasher were both determined, but the man who came did not have the tools to fix. The diswasher's "drain solenoid" is stuck open, thereby letting all the wash water out instead of keeping it inside the chamber for the wash cycle. And as imagined, the problem with the oven is indeed the thermostat. He said they might have to bring a new oven because the cost to repair this one is more than the oven is worth. That would be awesome to get a new one.

I've taken down the shelves & vanity cabinet from your new room and have patched the holes in the wall, to prep for painting. I patched some holes in the bathroom as well where an old towel bar used to be that I took down when I moved in (to make room for the over-toilet organizer.) I think a new towel bar in the bathroom will not be needed because I've gotten hooks for towels that hang over mine & Nessa's bedroom door. That also keeps the towels separate for sanitary reasons (not that anybody is dirty, but it is always nice to have a towel to yourself.)

I am still working on the organization of downstairs-- Nessa has a lot of toys & art supplies, and I have more books than I realized. I have moved stuff around several times to negotiate what might be the final layout. I think ultimately I will have to get some shelving for the overflow, which I picture being on the wall where the stairs meet, being out of the way of the main living space. The shared closet spaces downstairs are fully organized and I have 1/3 to 1/2 of the space opened up for your belongings.

I am particularly happy with Nessa/my room, in fact I can hardly resist laying on the bed everytime I go in there and just take in the sense of relaxation. The pink color has a suprisingly strong relaxing effect. I made some "curtain" pieces from fabric to cover the front of one of the white pressboard organizers, and I might make curtains for the other ones too. I'm going to get another picture frame or too for some of Nessa's artwork and photos, as opposed to thumbtacking them to the wall as I had done previously. It looks neater when the art is actually in frames. Hope to make a trip to Home Depot or Lowe's sometime this weekend.

Anyway, there is the update of how the house is going, and I hope you've had a nice day. I guess it is your day off? Well, looking forward to hearing how you are doing. Miss you a lot.

Love Pumpkin

Hello Super Sexy, Thanks for your reply. I am so happy to hear your neck problem is better. Today I had to stay home from work because Nessa woke up ill with a fever. By about 9:00am I was also pretty sick, so we've both laid around much of the day. Sore throat & aches, sore eyeballs, nothing too major. We were well enough to make a run to Biscuitville and get a late breakfast nonetheless. While at home one of the repair people came by and fixed the upstairs sink. The problem with both the oven and dishwasher were both determined, but the man who came did not have the tools to fix. The diswasher's "drain solenoid" is stuck open, thereby letting all the wash water out instead of keeping it inside the chamber for the wash cycle. And as imagined, the problem with the oven is indeed the thermostat. He said they might have to bring a new oven because the cost to repair this one is more than the oven is worth. That would be awesome to get a new one. I've taken down the shelves & vanity cabinet from your new room and have patched the holes in the wall, to prep for painting. I patched some holes in the bathroom as well where an old towel bar used to be that I took down when I moved in (to make room for the over-toilet organizer.) I think a new towel bar in the bathroom will not be needed because I've gotten hooks for towels that hang over mine & Nessa's bedroom door. That also keeps the towels separate for sanitary reasons (not that anybody is dirty, but it is always nice to have a towel to yourself.) I am still working on the organization of downstairs-- Nessa has a lot of toys & art supplies, and I have more books than I realized. I have moved stuff around several times to negotiate what might be the final layout. I think ultimately I will have to get some shelving for the overflow, which I picture being on the wall where the stairs meet, being out of the way of the main living space. The shared closet spaces downstairs are fully organized and I have 1/3 to 1/2 of the space opened up for your belongings. I am particularly happy with Nessa/my room, in fact I can hardly resist laying on the bed everytime I go in there and just take in the sense of relaxation. The pink color has a suprisingly strong relaxing effect. I made some "curtain" pieces from fabric to cover the front of one of the white pressboard organizers, and I might make curtains for the other ones too. I'm going to get another picture frame or too for some of Nessa's artwork and photos, as opposed to thumbtacking them to the wall as I had done previously. It looks neater when the art is actually in frames. Hope to make a trip to Home Depot or Lowe's sometime this weekend. Anyway, there is the update of how the house is going, and I hope you've had a nice day. I guess it is your day off? Well, looking forward to hearing how you are doing. Miss you a lot. Love Pumpkin

Hello Super Sexy, Thanks for your reply. I am so happy to hear your neck problem is better. Today I had to stay home from work because Nessa woke up ill with a fever. By about 9:00am I was also pretty sick, so we've both laid around much of the day. Sore throat & aches, sore eyeballs, nothing too major. We were well enough to make a run to Biscuitville and get a late breakfast nonetheless. While at home one of the repair people came by and fixed the upstairs sink. The problem with both the oven and dishwasher were both determined, but the man who came did not have the tools to fix. The diswasher's "drain solenoid" is stuck open, thereby letting all the wash water out instead of keeping it inside the chamber for the wash cycle. And as imagined, the problem with the oven is indeed the thermostat. He said they might have to bring a new oven because the cost to repair this one is more than the oven is worth. That would be awesome to get a new one. I've taken down the shelves & vanity cabinet from your new room and have patched the holes in the wall, to prep for painting. I patched some holes in the bathroom as well where an old towel bar used to be that I took down when I moved in (to make room for the over-toilet organizer.) I think a new towel bar in the bathroom will not be needed because I've gotten hooks for towels that hang over mine & Nessa's bedroom door. That also keeps the towels separate for sanitary reasons (not that anybody is dirty, but it is always nice to have a towel to yourself.) I am still working on the organization of downstairs-- Nessa has a lot of toys & art supplies, and I have more books than I realized. I have moved stuff around several times to negotiate what might be the final layout. I think ultimately I will have to get some shelving for the overflow, which I picture being on the wall where the stairs meet, being out of the way of the main living space. The shared closet spaces downstairs are fully organized and I have 1/3 to 1/2 of the space opened up for your belongings. I am particularly happy with Nessa/my room, in fact I can hardly resist laying on the bed everytime I go in there and just take in the sense of relaxation. The pink color has a suprisingly strong relaxing effect. I made some "curtain" pieces from fabric to cover the front of one of the white pressboard organizers, and I might make curtains for the other ones too. I'm going to get another picture frame or too for some of Nessa's artwork and photos, as opposed to thumbtacking them to the wall as I had done previously. It looks neater when the art is actually in frames. Hope to make a trip to Home Depot or Lowe's sometime this weekend. Anyway, there is the update of how the house is going, and I hope you've had a nice day. I guess it is your day off? Well, looking forward to hearing how you are doing. Miss you a lot. Love Pumpkin

Not long ago my wife started making more money than me. There, I said it. Don't think it was easy.

The male ego is strangely fragile when it comes to who brings home the bacon. So, I've found, is the female notion of who rules the roost at home.

In adjusting to our shifting roles, my wife and I have had to confront a lot of financial and emotional issues neither one of us saw coming. Who knew a little extra income could be such a burden?

Our family is hardly alone in grappling with that question. In a quarter of households where the wife brings home a paycheck, it's the big one. That's up from 16 percent of households 25 years ago.

And this trend is especially likely to build among us baby boomers: More and more women in midlife - kids grown - are dusting off their diplomas and making up for lost career time, while increasing numbers of us forty- and fifty-something guys are getting hit with the effects of steady downsizing throughout the economy.

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Certainly, there are plenty of benefits to having a high-earning woman in the family. In fact, when my wife's career as a marketing executive took off, I was thrilled - mostly because it was what she wanted but also because her earnings afforded us a better lifestyle and allowed me to pursue a riskier job track. (I left my full-time gig as a senior writer at Time magazine to do other kinds of writing.)

But the potential for psychological fallout is real. Money is a cold arbiter of power, and when a wife starts making more, both spouses may feel that the husband has somehow been demoted.

Sure, we boomers are supposed to be past all that. But reality doesn't always live up to our PC notions.

Once my wife's bigger paychecks started rolling in, her routine household reminders started sounding like orders to me. My wife sensed resistance, which struck her as sudden and senseless. She was hurt.

Meanwhile, her success at work brought lots of travel and late nights. She felt she needed to manage the house while away. But I had things under control and felt her calls to quiz me on the kids' whereabouts smacked of mistrust. So it was my turn to be hurt.

We joke now about giving orders and passing pop quizzes. But things might not be so funny if we hadn't talked honestly about the surprising stress that came with her greater earning power.

The following strategies helped us work through the strain. If you're dealing with a financial role reversal, they may help you too.

Talk, talk, talk

Communicating how you feel about the changes brought on by the shift in earning power is critical. My wife and I take several long walks together every week, giving us a valuable block of talk time free from distraction.

The walks began purely as exercise. But over the years we've conducted a lot of family business during this time. We've planned parties and bought houses.

Lately we've worked through the logistics and emotions of her soaring career. If you don't talk about your feelings, they're more likely to manifest in depression, withdrawal, aggression or blame.

Listen to your words for a clue.

Husbands, do you devalue her accomplishments? ("You make a lot of money, but you're never home.")

Do you undercut her family connections? ("I had to decide; you don't have time.")

Wives, do you undermine his provider instincts? ("I'll buy it with my money.") Or devalue his work? ("Maybe you should get another job.")

One way to move the conversation to higher ground is to focus on values that transcend income: trust, teamwork, achievement, personal growth. Talk about the shared goals you may be able to pursue because of the additional money now coming into the household (pay some big bills? renovate the kitchen? take a trip to Hawaii?).

Discuss the projects he can tackle if the income role reversal has resulted in his having more free time. He may not make as much, but there are other routes to mutual respect.

Be true partners

Hint to husbands: A little more help around the house goes a long way to easing tensions. Bonus points for anticipating what's needed without being told.

And both of you need to watch each other's back when outsiders make comments that press your role-reversal stress buttons.

That's when a code word or phrase comes in handy, says Stephen Goldbart, co-director of the Money, Meaning & Choices Institute in Kentfield, Calif. Something like "We should check on the kids" signals your spouse to change the subject or subtly come to your defense.

One of my wife's hot buttons is when friends talk about business travel as though it creates emotional distance from the family. I don't need a cue to chime in with how enriching and fun it is for our kids, who travel with her when possible.

Practice discretion

I'd bet most women don't care to call attention to their status as the family's No. 1 breadwinner, but they do want their husband to appreciate the sacrifices they've made to achieve their success.

Plenty of men are comfortable with earning less than their wife - as long as that fact isn't broadcast publicly. "I've interviewed high-earning women whose husbands say they are fine with it," says Olivia Mellan, a psychotherapist who specializes in money and relationship issues. "But then they ask me to please, please not mention it in my book where everyone will see it."

Do not lie about who makes most. Just don't volunteer the details or talk about them at length publicly if it makes him uncomfortable.

And if she's struggling to find the time for family connections, keep that between the two of you as well.

Set up personal accounts

My wife and I have merged assets since the day we were married. Now for the first time we're talking (on our walks) about peeling off small spending accounts for each of us.

What I buy with the cash in my private account will be my business and vice versa - she won't get to ask questions or pass judgment and I won't either.

Why now, after 21 years of marriage? It gets back to the subtle shifts in relationship power that often happen when a spouse who used to make less becomes the bigger earner.

Suddenly she may make purchases or other financial decisions without consulting her husband.

The subtext: "Hey, this is my money. I earned it, and I don't have to ask for permission."

He feels, "It's our money when I earn it, so it's our money when you do too, and I get a say in how it's spent."

Having small separate accounts honors both feelings, allowing each of you some space to spend as you please while you still make bigger financial decisions jointly.

Gloria Steinem once said that she had yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine a marriage and a career. As this balancing act grows more delicate, I have a feeling that's about to change.

My Dear Sexy,

Thanks so much for your email reply. I have been so busy. I am taking a quick break at work to reply to you. I certainly hope your neck area is getting better! Having a spasm in that area can ruin your day, you never realize how much you use your neck until it’s hurt.

Your commentary about being without cats is quite humorous. But, I hope you are not feeling lonely without them. It is good that you no longer have that annoyance factor though.

The house is shaping up well. The landlord/repair people have not shown up yet, to my knowledge. With the help of Nessa, yesterday we shredded 10 years worth of cancelled checks. That was a fun activity for her, and was nice to be rid of more packrat stuff. Just have a few more cabinets to go through and some filing to do.

Have some more stuff to do tonight since I don’t have Nessa with me. Maybe we can chat later if possible. Miss you much!

Love Pumpkin

My Dear Sexy,

Thanks so much for your email reply. I have been so busy. I am taking a quick break at work to reply to you. I certainly hope your neck area is getting better! Having a spasm in that area can ruin your day, you never realize how much you use your neck until it’s hurt.

Your commentary about being without cats is quite humorous. But, I hope you are not feeling lonely without them. It is good that you no longer have that annoyance factor though.

The house is shaping up well. The landlord/repair people have not shown up yet, to my knowledge. With the help of Nessa, yesterday we shredded 10 years worth of cancelled checks. That was a fun activity for her, and was nice to be rid of more packrat stuff. Just have a few more cabinets to go through and some filing to do.

Have some more stuff to do tonight since I don’t have Nessa with me. Maybe we can chat later if possible. Miss you much!

Love Pumpkin

My Dear Sexy,

Thanks so much for your email reply. I have been so busy. I am taking a quick break at work to reply to you. I certainly hope your neck area is getting better! Having a spasm in that area can ruin your day, you never realize how much you use your neck until it’s hurt.

Your commentary about being without cats is quite humorous. But, I hope you are not feeling lonely without them. It is good that you no longer have that annoyance factor though.

The house is shaping up well. The landlord/repair people have not shown up yet, to my knowledge. With the help of Nessa, yesterday we shredded 10 years worth of cancelled checks. That was a fun activity for her, and was nice to be rid of more packrat stuff. Just have a few more cabinets to go through and some filing to do.

Have some more stuff to do tonight since I don’t have Nessa with me. Maybe we can chat later if possible. Miss you much!

Love Pumpkin

Hello Sexy,

Just thought I'd write you an email instead of a text msg. I know that you are working two very long days this weekend & hope that it has been happy & easy. I miss you much.

Yesterday & today I painted mine & Nessa's room. The only colors the landlord allows is some form of off-white, so for the sake of Nessa, I painted it an off-white beige-pink. When the sunlight hits it it actually looks lavender, and I think she will like it. It only took about 6 hours total to complete. Soon I also plan to clean the carpet in the room that will be yours. If you'd like the room repainted, let me know.

I cleaned out yet more junk, having a couple more trashbags to go out. Makes the house feel much bigger! There is some more organization left for me to do & I hope to have it done today. Have to goto Target and get some storage products here in a little while. I have to especially get my desk area in order before I start taking classes. I am really looking forward to going back to college, and have also completed some more paperwork over the past couple days for U of Maryland.

I will have to rewire the cable internet for downstairs, as currently I have it rigged by drawing the cord through the upstairs window and down to the lower level, through the living room window.

I have temporarily sent Newbie back to her old home so that I can have my landlord come in to do the necessary repairs to the oven, dishwasher, upstairs faucet, & heater. Funny to note that I slept better without a cat crawling over me, I understand now the relief you felt when not having to get up for the cats. But, she will be coming back in the next couple weeks.

Looking foward to the roommate plan. I think it will help us both better our life circumstances. I know it might take a couple more months before anything happens, but I am trying to get everything ready as soon as possible. Boy, is this a bright spot in my life. I really look forward to it.

Been thinking about the refrigerator situation. I think we can survive with the mini fridge + the freezer, I will be taking care of the cooking anyway and I am used to doing everything with frozen food. But as time goes on we will learn whether or not this will be possible. I don't see that as a big worry.

Well anyway, hope you and doing well, and looking forward to hearing from you (but get some rest first!) I know you have worked really hard lately. I admire your work ethic. You are a good man. I love you so much!

Yours, Pumpkin

Sexy,

I know this is gross, but I have to tell you this for health reasons. I have figured out that the cat’s mange, a.k.a. “scabies” in humans, is what had spread to me, causing discomfort (you know what I mean?) They seek particular warm folds on the body. They leave behind razor thin red lines that look like cuts-- originally I thought (quite puzzled) I’d cut myself shaving multiple times...but now I know what’s up. Seem to have a small patch on my forearm too.

Luckily since they are likely the animal-borne version of the mite, they will probably die out in 12-30 days once exposure is removed. For your own health you probably need to either take the cats to the vet or something.

So unfortunately I cannot visit you again while the cats have mange. Also they might be hitching a ride on you when you come to visit me. Will have to stay away from each other for a couple weeks after you get the cats taken care of.

Anyways... thank God it is not a worse illness!! The moral of the story is... don’t let a mangy cat sleep between your legs! Hahaaa

Your Pumpkin

Dearest Sexy Hunk,

Thank you for your thoughtful and comprehensive reply. I am very pleased to hear you want to go forward with this plan. Also happy to hear about your update regarding the store.

In fact, I already have mostly cleared out the room upstairs that will go to you. It sure looks a lot bigger without all that stuff in there. I wanted to see if there really was enough space for my baby and I to share one room. Well, my baby and my clothes fit in the same closet without any problem. I moved my computer downstairs, and once that was out of the way, pretty much all mine and my baby's bedroom stuff fit without any undue effort. Still have some organizing work to do, and a few more trips to Goodwill & the trashcan.

On a different note, I have not yet gotten my tax refund, which was going to fund my travel to your house. My baby 's birthday broke my budget this month plus I overpaid on my loan, not thinking about things like gas money. Although, it is still possible I will get that refund tomorrow (Tuesday). I will let you know how that turns out.

If we don't chat tonight, have a nice sleep, interesting dreams, and I will get in touch w/you tomorrow.

Always Your Sweet,

Pumpkin

Dearest Sexy Hunk,

Thank you for your thoughtful and comprehensive reply. I am very pleased to hear you want to go forward with this plan. Also happy to hear about your update regarding the store.

In fact, I already have mostly cleared out the room upstairs that will go to you. It sure looks a lot bigger without all that stuff in there. I wanted to see if there really was enough space for my baby and I to share one room. Well, my baby and my clothes fit in the same closet without any problem. I moved my computer downstairs, and once that was out of the way, pretty much all mine and my baby's bedroom stuff fit without any undue effort. Still have some organizing work to do, and a few more trips to Goodwill & the trashcan.

On a different note, I have not yet gotten my tax refund, which was going to fund my travel to your house. My baby 's birthday broke my budget this month plus I overpaid on my loan, not thinking about things like gas money. Although, it is still possible I will get that refund tomorrow (Tuesday). I will let you know how that turns out.

If we don't chat tonight, have a nice sleep, interesting dreams, and I will get in touch w/you tomorrow.

Always Your Sweet,

Pumpkin

Dearest Sexy,

I have a proposition for you. I have been thinking about this for many many days now, so I am 100% sure this is something I'd personally like to do.

Remember when we had that misunderstanding about where you would stay after you move to Winston-Salem? I originally stated that only a short-term stay was workable. Well, I thought about it for awhile after that, and decided that it might actually be a good idea to share a household. Let me give you a run-down of the idea I had in mind.

I think you would be a good roommate, when you move to Winston. If you take this offer, you would be in for 1/3 of the expenses (since there would be 3 people here.) This comes out to about $350 a month which includes all current utilities. I would simply ask for that as a flat rate each month. You would have your own room, and Nessa and I would share a room (the bigger of the two, currently my office).

Even though we are involved with each other in an intimate way, I still think looking at this like a practical roommate arrangement is best.

Here are some reasons why I think this will be beneficial. From a compatibility standpoint we are both quiet people, have similar sleep patterns, value clean and tidy housekeeping, are frugal, don't watch TV much, and have mutual respect. This arrangement stands to help us both financially; I could pay off debt and afford online college. I'm sure you could do something special with the extra cash, whether it be saving up, investing, helping your mom, going back to school, or anything your heart desires.

Domestic tasks would also be simpler if we break it into roles we both enjoy. I could make dinner most nights, and you could take care of most of the yard work. Food expenses could be casually shared & we could benefit from buying in bulk. Cleaning house is something we already do in our current homes; I feel assured you are the type to clean up after yourself even with a woman in the house.

It's important to note that due to work, travel, and school, we would still not have a lot of time to see each other even if we lived together. I would be busy once I got home, and we might be seeing each other only at dinner.

You would have time to yourself probably every week since you get mostly weekdays off. I would still visit my family every other weekend. But, we could go on dates/"sleepovers" just as usual when Nessa is away (Wednesdays and every other weekend). Except, there would be no 2 1/2 hour drive to worry about.

The things that might pose problems are as follows. We could not probably have 3 cats here. Also, there may not be enough room for all your furnishings. These are two things we will have to work on if you take this offer.

You will also have to decide if you are prepared to live in a home with a 7-year old. Some days are fun, but some days are annoying. You would not be expected to take on a parental role. However, because Nessa admires you she will probably seek your attention sometimes. She is talkative and asks lots of questions, and wants to be included in things. Every so often she might pitch a fit over something that seems irrational and it is a very unpleasurable thing to witness. You are a good role model, and this is also a benefit to me & Nessa. But, you have to consider whether this is a benefit to you. Think about whether being a male role model is a rewarding experience to your heart, or if it doesn't really do anything for you. Remember it is normal to get disgusted by children, especially when they are not your own. Just recognize whether you are willing/able to cope with such feelings from time to time.

Anyways, I plan to get rid of some more junk if you decide to make this move. That way we won't be so crowded. I do think there is plenty of room for the three of us, as long as we stay reasonably organized and avoid excess. Neatness will be important.

If you'd like to do this, let me know. You do not have to give an immediate answer; just think about it. Please read at least twice before making a decision.

I hope you have a deliciously wonderful day!

Yours always,

Pumpkin

Dearest Sexy,

I have a proposition for u. I have been thinking about this 4 many many days now, so I am 100% sure this is something I'd personally like to do.

Remember when we had that misunderstanding about where u would stay after you move here? I originally stated that only a short-term stay was workable. Well, I thought about it 4 awhile after that, and decided that it might actually be a good idea to share a household. Let me give you a run-down of the idea I had in mind.

I think u would be a good roommate, when u move to here. If u take this offer, u would be in for 1/3 of the expenses (since there would be 3 people here.) This comes out to about $350 a month which includes all current utilities. I would simply ask 4 that as a flat rate each month. U would have ur own room, baby and I would share a room (the bigger of the 2, currently my office).

Even though we are involved with each other in an intimate way, I still think looking at this like a practical roommate arrangement is best.

Here are some reasons why I think this will be beneficial. From a compatibility standpoint we are both quiet people, have similar sleep patterns, value clean and tidy housekeeping, are frugal, don't watch TV much, and have mutual respect. This arrangement stands to help us both financially; I could pay off debt and afford online college. I'm sure u could do something special with the extra cash, whether it be saving up, investing, helping your mom, going back to school, or anything ur heart desires.

Domestic tasks would also be simpler if we break it into roles we both enjoy. I could make dinner most nights, and u could take care of most of the yard work. Food expenses could be casually shared & we could benefit from buying in bulk. Cleaning house is something we already do in our current homes; I feel assured u are the type to clean up after yourself even with a woman in the house.

It's important to note that due to work, travel, and school, we would still not have a lot of time to see each other even if we lived together. I would be busy once I got home, and we might be seeing each other only at dinner.

U would have time to yourself probably every week since you get mostly weekdays off. I would still visit my family every other weekend. But, we could go on dates/"sleepovers" just as usual when baby is away (Wednesdays and every other weekend). Except, there would be no 2 1/2 hour drive to worry about.

The things that might pose problems are as follows. We could not probably have 3 cats here. Also, there may not be enough room for all your furnishings. These are two things we will have to work on if u take this offer.

U will also have to decide if you are prepared to live in a home with a 7-year old. Some days are fun, but some days are annoying. You would not be expected to take on a parental role. However, because Nessa admires you she will probably seek your attention sometimes. She is talkative and asks lots of questions, and wants to be included in things. Every so often she might pitch a fit over something that seems irrational and it is a very unpleasurable thing to witness. You are a good role model, and this is also a benefit to me & Nessa. But, you have to consider whether this is a benefit to you. Think about whether being a male role model is a rewarding experience to your heart, or if it doesn't really do anything for you. Remember it is normal to get disgusted by children, especially when they are not your own. Just recognize whether you are willing/able to cope with such feelings from time to time.

Anyways, I plan to get rid of some more junk if you decide to make this move. That way we won't be so crowded. I do think there is plenty of room for the three of us, as long as we stay reasonably organized and avoid excess. Neatness will be important.

If you'd like to do this, let me know. U do not have to give an immediate answer; just think about it. Please read at least twice before making a decision.

I hope u have a deliciously wonderful day!

Yours always,

Pumpkin

Dearest Sexy,

I have a proposition for u. I have been thinking about this 4 many many days now, so I am 100% sure this is something I'd personally like to do.

Remember when we had that misunderstanding about where u would stay after you move here? I originally stated that only a short-term stay was workable. Well, I thought about it 4 awhile after that, and decided that it might actually be a good idea to share a household. Let me give you a run-down of the idea I had in mind.

I think u would be a good roommate, when u move to here. If u take this offer, u would be in for 1/3 of the expenses (since there would be 3 people here.) This comes out to about $350 a month which includes all current utilities. I would simply ask 4 that as a flat rate each month. U would have ur own room, baby and I would share a room (the bigger of the 2, currently my office).

Even though we are involved with each other in an intimate way, I still think looking at this like a practical roommate arrangement is best.

Here are some reasons why I think this will be beneficial. From a compatibility standpoint we are both quiet people, have similar sleep patterns, value clean and tidy housekeeping, are frugal, don't watch TV much, and have mutual respect. This arrangement stands to help us both financially; I could pay off debt and afford online college. I'm sure u could do something special with the extra cash, whether it be saving up, investing, helping your mom, going back to school, or anything ur heart desires.

Domestic tasks would also be simpler if we break it into roles we both enjoy. I could make dinner most nights, and u could take care of most of the yard work. Food expenses could be casually shared & we could benefit from buying in bulk. Cleaning house is something we already do in our current homes; I feel assured u are the type to clean up after yourself even with a woman in the house.

It's important to note that due to work, travel, and school, we would still not have a lot of time to see each other even if we lived together. I would be busy once I got home, and we might be seeing each other only at dinner.

U would have time to yourself probably every week since you get mostly weekdays off. I would still visit my family every other weekend. But, we could go on dates/"sleepovers" just as usual when baby is away (Wednesdays and every other weekend). Except, there would be no 2 1/2 hour drive to worry about.

The things that might pose problems are as follows. We could not probably have 3 cats here. Also, there may not be enough room for all your furnishings. These are two things we will have to work on if u take this offer.

U will also have to decide if you are prepared to live in a home with a 7-year old. Some days are fun, but some days are annoying. You would not be expected to take on a parental role. However, because Nessa admires you she will probably seek your attention sometimes. She is talkative and asks lots of questions, and wants to be included in things. Every so often she might pitch a fit over something that seems irrational and it is a very unpleasurable thing to witness. You are a good role model, and this is also a benefit to me & Nessa. But, you have to consider whether this is a benefit to you. Think about whether being a male role model is a rewarding experience to your heart, or if it doesn't really do anything for you. Remember it is normal to get disgusted by children, especially when they are not your own. Just recognize whether you are willing/able to cope with such feelings from time to time.

Anyways, I plan to get rid of some more junk if you decide to make this move. That way we won't be so crowded. I do think there is plenty of room for the three of us, as long as we stay reasonably organized and avoid excess. Neatness will be important.

If you'd like to do this, let me know. U do not have to give an immediate answer; just think about it. Please read at least twice before making a decision.

I hope u have a deliciously wonderful day!

Yours always,

Pumpkin