Homes Deux

Have you ever had a hockey related dream, other than playing for the NHL or winning the Stanley Cup?

Really, this could apply to any sport.

Panthers RW Scottie Upshall denied he squirted Lightning rookie D Radko Gudas with water in the second period of Sunday's game. It was blue Gatorade, he said, laughing.

Basic Gudas fell next to the Panther bench after a check & was squirted with Gatorade by Upshall. Gudas got up, smashed his stick on the boards, and was ejected from the game.

Soooooooo.......ooooooooooo........oooooooooo.......

What reaction or retaliation should be accepted to make the confrontation a wash...(no penalties given)? Spit in the face? Flip the bird? Punch in the face? Or be classy, and kick his tail on the ice?

Holy cow! TSN picks are off on their pick lineup.

If you could chose to listen to the action as an audience member (like just put microphones all over the stage), or listen these guys on the live NBC/TSN feed, which would you pick?

BQ: Why bother wearing a suit jacket, when you have to take it off to put on a jersey?

Really what does banging on glass accomplish? Just a follow-up from my last question.

I just bought Wen shampoo off of an ad next to my last hockey question. I want Brian Engblom hair. Can I achieve this perfection?

1. What is worse? People banging on the glass or people yelling from the 2nd level at a particular player?

2. You know you’re a hockey dork when you wake up out of a dead sleep and yell 'Guy Lafleur'. When I get off the baby killer pills, and I have a boy, I am going to name my kid “Dude Flower”. His chances of being light in loafers?

3. I think the perfect hockey food has not been invented. It must be on a stick, it must have meat (or tofu if you’re like that), and it must be easy to understand (aka not a hot dog). What could this be?

4. Tonight, watching the Bolts game, they played the American National Anthem, and on the first level the crowd passed the American flag in such a way…like doing the wave. What prevents a Canadian disgruntled fan from snagging the flag and doing something naughty? Do like mimes?

5. I hate jerseys with laces at the neck. The only other option is the v-neck looking thing. What could be cooler at the neck? Turtle neck? Gold Medallion? Clock? Crew neck? Polo collar?

6. So, the Bolts have a new organ…all fancy and whatnot. Really….what song is awesome on the pipe organ? I mean…a song within the past century?

7. What mascot has not been used by any professional team…and SOOOO needs to be used?

I changed my job, so life has been crazy. Sorry for missing out on all hockey in my life.

Questions:

1. How many fantasy leagues are you in this season?

2. What have I missed in your life?

3. Who will win the Stanley Cup?

Love you guys...keep it real...and all that. Cheers.

He looks like a young Robert Englund, huh? creepy.

P.S. Lity owes me a bucket of chicken and a case of beer and a upgrade on that cabin.

Floyd Mayweather, Paul Pierce, Michael Irving, Manny Ramirez, David Beckham, Kyle Busch, Kobe Bryant, Ray Lewis, Tiger Woods, Randy Moss, A-Rod, Terrell Owens, Chad Ochocinco AND Sean Avery are all in one room. All blank boring plain walls, ceiling, and floor. There is a small 3 inch by 3 inch mirror sitting on the floor in the corner of the room….all 14 men see this mirror at the same time.

1) What happens next?

2) Did I leave somebody off this list?

3) Should I remove somebody from this list?

Sike! Really, I can’t remember the last time I said , “Sike!”…yes, I am like 8 years old. Want to trade Garbage Pail Kids?

Can you answer these imaginary hockey questions???

Off the serious tip, finish off these scenarios.

1) Naughty YOU! Since you never brushed your teeth as a child, you now need root canal surgery. Waiting in the chair at the dentist office, Bobby Clarke walks in and explains that he is now a dentist. What do you do and or say next?

2) Payday! You go into the bank to deposit your paycheck. When the teller gives you the receipt, the total balance in your checking account is WAY more than normal. You go home and check your account online, & discover that a $20,000 deposit was put into your account. When you click on the copy of the check that was deposited, you discover that it is a check from Brian Burke’s personal checking account & it is made payable to you. Tell me how this happened?

3) Your friend invites you to the local hockey arena because they opened a tavern inside that makes a killer hamburger. Even though the rink is closed, you can see somebody skating on the ice. Since this new pub is on the 3rd level, you can’t really make out his face. At one point the player stops, looks up at you, points at your face with one glove, and then flips you the bird with the other. You then realize that it’s your arch-nemesis, Tood Bertuzzi! Why did you flip you off?

Getting a little giggity over the trade deadline….and memories of that day on here from years past…came flooding back. The ‘ol “So and so got traded to blank for 4.5 mil….is he worth it?” Ahhh, memories. Here are some trade deadline opinion questions to rock your face.

1) Brad Richards…if you know that Dallas was not going to resign him…and you knew that he was going to be traded to the Kings, Rangers, Habs, Sabres, or Leafs…where do you see him ending up….out of the teams list above? Why?

2) Since I see a bunch of new faces, so I will dumb things down a bit. A “rental player”, is a player that is obtained by a team that has an anticipated shot for a cup run before the trade deadline. This player will be at the end of his contract, and is offered a deal with the intention of making it deeper into the playoffs, with no intention of resigning the player once the season is over. Think “Hossa”. Who will be this year’s big “rental” player deal? Any prediction of what team takes him?

Funny...then the Rangers, really WOULD be the Rags....nuck, nuck, nuck.

Tampon Bay Lightning Tampon...man, I am a marketing genius.

The 7 wonders of my brain for the last 5 minutes.

1. Can a team change their jersey and/or logo every season without approval from other NHL owners?

2. Can a player change his name thus making his contract void?

3. If fan buys season tickets and every game gives them to stinky hobos, would the bums be kicked out for stinking?

4. Can a team decorate the visitor’s locker-room in a sexually distracting way?

5. Can a player still moonlight (a.k.a work somewhere else other than playing hockey)? What if it is a different sport... like arena football?

6. If you are a fan in California attending lets say a Kings game, can you smoke pot during intermission if it is medically necessary?

7. Can the NHL sue you if you repetitively use similar NHL team logos in your art?

Answer one, answer none, answer all...whatever.

Have a super awesome day.

...why not have fans of the game actually call-in who they think should be the stars of the week/month?

Also: My brother lives near Vancouver, so he is always buying me Nucks gear. For Christmas, I got a robe, and some pajama shorts, and a t-shirt. I support most of the NHL, so normally I do not mind, but I think I official own more Canucks stuff that their true fans. How do I tell my brother that if he his going to buy me NHL clothing to try to give me a little variety?

I would love to know how your Christmas, Boxing Day, and New Years went <---not really a question, but whatever.

1) I was trying to sell my Bolts vs. Montreal tickets in the local web, newspaper classifieds. I stole a picture from the Internet (Downie smashing Cammalleri into the boards) and used it as the thumbnail pic for the ad. Later my advertisement was removed, and I found out later it was removed for illegal stealing of a copyrighted image from the NHL. No refund was given. I violated the terms. What person do you believe investigates stolen imagery in this situation? The NHL or the local Newspaper?

2) What do you think is the most common first name right now in the NHL?

3) There was a rule change this year. Previously, during a penalty shot, if a goaltender threw his stick at the shooting player or deliberately dislodged the net, a goal was awarded to the shooting team. They removed the word ‘deliberately’, therefore if the goalie accidentally dislodges the net…it is a goal for the other team. What is preventing players from rushing the goaltender during penalty shots? It is rare as a player to get a penalty while performing a penalty shot.

4) I found a typo on the NHL website. When you scroll to the bottom, look under the “ABOUT” category, and click on ‘History’, it will show ‘Epic Players’ in the middle of the page. It shows: Wayne Gretzky, Maurice Richards, and Jean Beliveau. The description under all three men it says: “NHL.com takes you for a tour of "The Great One's" career with a look back at his greatest game, his Hall of Fame induction and his place among hockey's immortals.” Poor Richard and Beliveau. Can you find any typos or have you ever seen any typos on NHL.com

Have a great Christmas, Hanukkah, or whatever it is you celebrate!!!!!!!!!!

I am only asking this again, because it did not post yesterday.

In the world it seems that money can buy you almost anything. For the right price, you can even fly into space.

So here’s my questions: For $100,000, you as a fan could play 5 minutes of real NHL hockey. Obviously, you must know how to skate, and you would have to attend at least 3 team practices. In return, any team of your choice (depending on availability) must play you for at least 5 minutes in one game (not including playoffs or preseason). Your team could potentially earn up to $8,200,000, which they could use to bulk up their own roster, and it would NOT be calculated into the Cap or CBA. Of course, the most desirable teams will most likely have a “guest” player every night with means more money, but teams that are less desirable like Atlanta, will probably benefit from the increased stats from the lack of a “guest” player. As a fan, it would be exciting if your team’s “guest” player was actually good, and it would also be entertaining if the opposing team’s “guest” player were awful.

1) Love the idea or hate the idea?

2) What are the biggest flaws with this idea?

Disclaimer: If you do not know me, I would never really want to see the game changed, and this question is solely for research purposes.

I am asking this again, only because it did not post yesterday. Roar.

Okay, here is a wild one. Stop giving penalties for fighting or instigating. Monetarily fine the individual player that gets into a fight. That right, you heard me, if a player wants to fight another, he has to pay a fine out of his salary. This would mean that when a team is looking for a gritty chippy player, they will have to pay them more, so the player can pay for their physical craft. Sure, in the beginning of the season, fights would be galore, but then at the end of the season….when things are getting close in the playoff race, the teams that have players that have been good, would have the upper hand. Fines would be determined by the severity of the fight after the game by the Toronto War Room video goal judges.

1) Love the idea or hate the idea?

2) What are the biggest flaws with this idea?

Disclaimer: If you do not know me, I would never really want to see the game changed, and this question is solely for research purposes

In the shootout, a team 3rd shooter MUST be the goaltender. It could really make or break teams that often go into OT. Think about it, say your most beloved team is the Devils. They are playing the Flames and it goes past OT and into the shootout. The first shooter is Elias , the second shooter is Jason Arnott, and the 3rd shooter is Brodeur (because of this new rule). Now I know that brodeur was a forward when he was a kid, so he might have some crazy awesome wrist shot.

1) Love the idea or hate the idea?

2) What are the biggest flaws with this idea?

Disclaimer: If you do not know me, I would never really want to see the game changed, and this question is solely for research purposes.