Question about communal living and tackling a difficult housemate?

Question

I live with 16 other people and share a kitchen and fridges. Since a certain person moved in two months ago, things keep dissapearing from the fridge (a six pack of beer etc.). The other day someone nicked my cheese so I wrote a polite note not accusing anyone, asking whoever took it to replace it and ask before they took next time. There is now a note attached to my note saying "suck my balls, *****." While it would be satisfying to write "you'd have to grow a set first" in response, is there anything else I could do to move the problem toward some sort of resolution rather than coming down to this person's level? We don't know who it is (suspicion is based solely on the fact that this didn't happen before this person moved in) and therefore can't accuse them outright.
BTW, I don't like leaving notes as a rule, but it wasn't the first thing they took so someone had to do something. 
Also, is it worth saying anything to our letting agent (even though he's a waste of space)?

Northern Spriggan · Accepted Answer

This always has, and always will happen in communal Kitchens

If you want to hang onto what you buy keep it in your room, there is no other solution

Sparklepop · Answer

Hi!

Unfortunately, I know this doesn't help much, but this is often the case when you share a place, especially with so many people.

In my first year of Uni, there were 12 of us sharing one shower, two toilets and one kitchen. Generally things were pretty good and everyone shared once we got to know each other - but the one exception was food, because especially if you are a student, you can't afford much. Of course, you wouldn't mind if someone used a bit of your cheese or a couple of rounds of bread and told you about it afterwards and said they were desperate and they would return the favour! But like your situation, there was one guy who was just a bit disrespectful for other people's property and he would just take what he wanted, when he wanted. Unfortunately it's a fact of life - some people believe that they can do and take what they want. The guy who is stealing things in your place sounds like a total d*ck.

It doesn't sound like he'll listen to any kind of reason. It doesn't sound like he's even worth getting on the good side of.

There are a few things you could do, but unfortunately they all require effort on your part and won't change this guy's behaviour. Firstly, if you haven't already got one, get a mini-fridge for your room. The most annoying thing in the world is when a staple like cheese, milk, etc goes missing, because you always need that stuff! Keep the stuff you rely on most in your room, if possible.

Another thing you could do, if you know which shelf in the fridge is his, is to start taking some of his stuff. I bet he won't like it. If he doesn't care, hell, you've got yourself some free food. If you're not the only one who is bothered by his behaviour, even better. You can all start stealing stuff from him. It's obviously him doing it if this didn't happen before he moved in. Unless of course you only lived together for a week or so before this new guy came along - in which case, I suppose it could be anyone.

If it isn't this new guy, he'll be so upset about people stealing his stuff that he'll want to find out who it is too. He doesn't need to know that you took it.

As for telling your letting agent, unfortunately I doubt he will care. All he wants is your money - he's not interested in disputes.

If it continues though, or something big goes missing, then it's a more serious kind of theft and you can speak to your letting agent and see what happens. If you can get a few people on your side, this would be better - or he'll think that you're just the 'uptight one' (every communal house has one!)

If all else fails, set up a hidden webcam in the kitchen and catch the culprit red-handed, lol!

And on the bright side, I'm guessing you won't be living there forever :-)

xx Emmie

EDIT - I'm loving the laxatives idea! You'll soon know who the culprit is when he's running to the bathroom every 2 minutes!

Anonymous · Answer

I would have to agree with the the top two answerers.  It will always happen no matter what, but a good old dose of lax on something tasty would be a great revenge!!  let us know what happened!! 

and 16 people!!! how do you keep the kitchen clean!!!?!?!??!!?

Goose · Answer

I'd leave something tasty looking in the fridge and dose it heavily with ex-lax ( or whatever, use your imagination ) then watch and wait. Then I should think a severe kicking and bodily eviction would be the logical next steps. Police your environment or they'll all start taking the piss.

honourableone · Answer

Definitely reply with that reply. It is awesome. Try putting a camera there to prove it, or buy really old cheese and repackage it, or drug it or something. And if you are really sure who it is, then its prank time.


I doubt the agent will look twice at you if you say "someone stole my ceese" especially if hes a waste of space.

Anonymous · Answer

Tip-toeing around subject concerns like this potential they strengthen and undesirable feeling festers. you may desire to handle it head-one, firmly yet civilly. attempt to call a resident assembly by using putting a observe up in a complication-unfastened section, state whilst and what time you like the assembly to be, (if human beings have the choose to make it they are going to so do no longer attempt to house anybody with dates/situations), additionally initiate an schedule, and placed as merchandise a million - the thank you to handle issues that pass lacking and invite different schedule products in case different individuals have diverse subject concerns. whilst the perpetrator realises there is repercussions for their strikes they might think of two times next time - yet there might desire to continuously be floor rules besides. additionally keep in mind it would desire to have been a drunken prank - so be arranged to grant a touch floor.

Question about communal living and tackling a difficult housemate?

6 Answers