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V-Day Gift: Yes or No?

I'm contemplating whether or not to have a Valentine's Day gift delivered to a very close friend of mine.

We've known each other for nearly 8 years but lost contact with her for the last two. In the beginning, we were intimate, but for the wrong reasons. Over the years, we became very close. We told each other and talked about things that we'd never tell anyone else. But, either one or both of us would be involved with someone else, so nothing ever happened.

We got back in contact a few months ago and starting hanging out more for the past couple of month, but things have changed. She now has a six month old baby girl and is single (father's a LOSER). I want to do something nice for her. I want her to feel loved and appreciated, but at the same time, I don't want her to feel overwhelmed or pressured into anything.

I was thinking about sending red roses and chocolates to her and also having a nice bouquet of flowers delivered to her mom and baby girl as well. If we were lovers; I wouldn't even be on here asking this question...So, there's my dilemma.

13 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago

    I think a nice thoughtful gesture that expresses ones affections/friendship is always good form. I think it is nice.

    That being said... a single mom goes without so many things, especially in these difficult economic times. The cost of flowers is so jacked up at Valentines Day... if you were going to send flowers to all three of them (your friend, her baby, and her mom) that's a huge chunk of change...maybe there is something more useful that they might need... even a gift certificate for them to go out to dinner would be nice...

    For the daughter, a gift card to My Gym or Music & Me would be really nice to show that you care about the little baby girl too... A 6 month old doesn't need or care about flowers.

    I get that you don't want the gift to come with obligations or pressure--just to be thoughtful. I think that is so nice... And I don't think the flowers are wrong in any way if that is what you want to do... I'm just thinking if they are struggling right now... that's a lot of money to piss away on things that are just gonna die. And honestly the last thing a post partum woman wants is chocolates when we are trying to get our figures back... Or maybe that's just me. :) But the thoughtfulness thing? Yes! That would definitely be appreciated.

    I hope things will work out for you all. :)

  • 1 decade ago

    I get that you dont want her to feel pressure so I guess the big thing is instead of focusing on that focus on what you think would make her relax and enjoy the day. Instead of getting her something ask mom to babysit while you and her get dressed up and go out to a nice dinner. It would give her the opportunity to get dressed nice, not worry about her daughter for a little while and you guys talk. No pressure there. It's only a big deal if you make it a big deal. Same with pressure, there's only pressure if you focus on the pressure. The day is about having a good time. Hope everything works out! :)

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    That would def. be a nice gesture. She probably would really appreciate it and it would give her a nice surprise. What's the worst thing that could happen? Nothing comes out of this. You sound like you genuinely want her to feel great by sending her something special so go for it!

  • ?
    Lv 4
    5 years ago

    that's a perplexing question. In all honesty, i think of crimson roses and goodies are going slightly too far. i be attentive to that if I won those from somebody who I had that variety of background with, i might experience compelled. i think of i might bypass away off the goodies, and %. yet another variety of flower to construct a bouquet from. on the plus, I do somewhat like the assumption of sending plant existence to her daughter. It comes off as an extremely candy gesture.

  • 1 decade ago

    well im a girl and it seems like you guys did have a 'thing' so i dont see the big problem in sending flowers and some chocolate. i know for a fact that girls love it when guys are thinking about them <33

    so go for it and maybe it will work out. (:

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    sounds like a good idea

  • 1 decade ago

    what can it hurt. its a nice thing to do. it would probably make her feel special.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    aw. sounds like an amazing idea. she'll love it!

  • 1 decade ago

    wow yer a really nice guy !

    if i were her ied cry (:

    ahaha do it(;

  • awwwww yes, that would be so sweet (: if i were that lady, i'd love it if u did that (:

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