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Date wants to meet my family too soon?
My dilemma; I met this guy on a dating app. We talked for about 3 weeks and met up, watched a movie, and had an amazing time. He's very funny, going to school, has a job, and respects me more than anyone else I have been around. We talked at this point for about 5 weeks and had two in-person dates and sometimes virtual. He seems really good for me. The issue I am having now is that he is pressing me really hard to meet my family. I feel like a different person around them rather than when I am around him. I'm not hiding anything. I feel it is too soon, and it's making me sick feeling because I don't want to make him mad or hurt his feelings. I've tried gently mentioning that I'm not ready and nervous, but he doesn't seem to understand that I am genuinely not ready. What do I do here without ruining a potential relationship?
Thank you to everyone that took the time to read and answer my question with helpful feedback. I think I wasn't being upfront with my feelings because I was worried about hurting him, but its not okay to just ignore my feelings for his sake. After reading all of your answers I talked to him and was more direct and firm about how I felt and he understood and it all worked out. So, thank you all again :)
4 Answers
- Brenda MorrisLv 69 months agoFavourite answer
You seem to feel he is rushing things and you are not ready for that just now. If he ignores your feelings now and moves on with his plans of meeting your parents it will accelerate your relationship. So feeling like if you say no to him is going to hurt his feelings is probably accurate - however he is hurting your feelings by not respecting them and not trying to work with you rather than against you. So this is an important decision. Better be more frank with him and tell him you are not ready for him to meet your parents but perhaps later when you feel ready. If he keeps on pushing to meet them then - he will not respect your feelings later either. Best to know this issue right now.
- Anonymous9 months ago
two actual face to face meetings? Way too soon. I have no idea why he is so wanting to meet them. Something is not right, most guys do not want to meet the parents. Tell him, you need to know him a lot better before that can happen. If he has a problem with that, dump him. You need to spend actual dates, in person before you truly know him. Do not worry about him getting mad, if he does, there is something wrong here.
- Anonymous9 months ago
He can't meet them.
- Anonymous9 months ago
Just tell him that you would love to introduce him to your family someday, but right now is too soon. He can meet them when the time is right, but first you should focus on getting to know each other. Maybe he’s just insecure and thinks you’re ashamed of him, but I agree that it’s too soon to get families involved. Maybe you can compromise by letting him meet one of your friends? You only met this man twice. I wouldn’t bring a man to meet my family until I was sure the relationship was going somewhere.
