who "owns" my mother?

Question

My mother, a senior citizen, is in assisted living retirement in CA.  Due to lockdown, I have not been inside her room since March :(.

Although therapists have gained access to her room this fall, I have not.  I am also a health care provider, however, this fact means nothing to management.

The retirement facility tests for COVID each week (OK, whatever), and have promised me that vaccines will arrive in January.  I feel I have no control at all in this matter.

Because of 
https://edition.cnn.com/interactive/2020/08/health/coronavirus-vaccine-race-intl/
(I don't want a "race"!!  I want (insist) on a scientific, methodological production of a vaccine).  This article also says it should take at least 4 yrs for one to develop.

https://www.cnbc.com/2020/12/11/white-house-threatens-to-fire-fda-chief-unless-covid-vaccine-oked-friday-report.html
this vaccine should be developed/ released independent of political pressure.

I can wait before accepting this vaccine.  I personally have already been vaccinated for influenza this year, and had another injection last year, so I'm not "anti-vaxxer".

So, does the county and/ or state "own" my mother, that they can make all pandemic decisions for her, regardless of family wishes?

I would like some control and authority (i.e. "ownership") (especially as "power of attorney for health care") over medical procedures performed.

Slickterp · Answer

No one owns her.  If she is of sound mind, she decides for herself.  The only way to get a POA is for her to grant it to you.  Otherwise, she makes her own decisions.

Anonymous · Answer

Sorry to say: if you are a healthcare provider taking care of Covid patients I would not want you in the nursing home facility with my family. Sorry.

StephenWeinstein · Answer

No one "owns" her.  Humans in the U.S. have not been owned since 1865 (prior to that, slaves were owned by their masters).

STEVEN F · Answer

The Constitution says NO ONE owns ANYONE.

You ARE NOT a healthcare provider with the facility. By any logic where being a health care provider anywhere else means SQUAT, a dentist should be able to walk into the ICU of any hospital. Being a relative SHOULD mean far more than being a health care provider.

Based on your last sentence, I would be surprised in you are licensed to clean the floor in a health care facility.

Old Man Dirt · Answer

If your mother is of sound mind then she will be given the choice.
If your mother is not of sound mind then who ever is the person listed as having the medical power of attorney.

Bruce · Answer

Nobody owns your mother. If you are asking who can make decisions for her, that depends on her condition. She may be of sound mind to make her own decisions, she may have a Power of Attorney, or she may have a court appointed guardian. If you are asking about visitation, that is up to the facility but they normally follow CDC guidelines.

Spock (rhp) · Answer

your only decision is to remove your mother from their care or to accept their doctor's decision regarding the CV19 vaccine in her case.  that's it -- the care home is private and has right to make own rules, including that all medically eligible residents SHALL be vaccinated for CV19 -- or shall leave their facility.  GL finding any such home that, quite soon, will accept anyone as a resident who has not been vaccinated for CV19 -- their insurers will insist on it.  -- grampa

ihavqs2 · Answer

spinesign:   Your mother owns herself.   You do not own her.   The facility she is living at does not own her.   Your mother is not a slave.  
   
The rules and laws have been put in place for everyone’s protection - they are for the greatest good.   Although this time is very difficult, it will end.   Exercise patience;  your calmness will keep your mother calm (Pretend if you have to).   
You can:  telephone your mother, write to your mother, send pictures etc to your mother, send flowers to your mother on special days, be a “cheerleader” for your mother, encourage others (family members, her friends, her church family, etc.) to also do the same.

? · Answer

You want ownership. NOT going to happen. That's disgusting. If your mother is not incompetent, she can give you power of attorney. Or choose not to, which it appears perhaps is the case.

The fact that you are a health care provider should mean nothing to management. You are not HER provider.
 
Perhaps your mother would prefer to run her own life.

Mark · Answer

They own the home, you do not.  These rules are in place to protect everybody, not just your mom.

who "owns" my mother?

12 Answers