Marriage / Divorce / Should I ask my neighbour? - Delicate Question?

Question

Our long-time neighbour is commuting on the same train as I do. We are friendly but not SO close, just nice and casually know each other. He's an old school mate of my husband, a nice guy. The other night I noticed he was a bit drunk and told me that his wife is constantly nagging at him (they go over 25 years), and he's sick of it etc. Yesterday, I again met him and he offered me a ride home since his wife was picking him up from the train station as it was raining. He slightly held on to me and I noticed he was a bit tipsy. His wife then said hello, was nice to me but started nagging at him. She's been a real pain and it was embarrassing for me. She was having a go at him at being late and drinking and he should come home from work immediately etc. etc. and the lot. I think he's not happy in his marriage and wants out as my husband did with his first wife.

Shall I pick up this delicate topic with him? I'm not sure. I don't want to stick my nose into something that's none of my business. But then, perhaps he is waiting for somebody to notice? What do you think?

Suzanne lily of the valley · Answer

To be honest: MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS!  You do not live with them; you are only seeing a fraction of what takes place.

Nagging occurs when the one who should be doing something doesn't!

There have been times I have been upset with my husband and he with me and unfortunately, not always behind closed doors; so on lookers would assume one of us was a nasty piece of work. Actually some  have said that of my husband and although he is not by any means the best of husband's, he does try and so a lot of what is said about him is rather unfair.

You and this neighbour are not being honest. You obviously fancy each other. Him because he is critisizing his wife to another woman and you because you are feeling embarrassed for him.

Leave them to sort their own marriage out.

Londinium Cross · Answer

OK, that's why I'm asking here. It's a relief to me that you think I shouldn't say anything. Just wanted to be mindful but I'm not keen on doing something.

? · Answer

He's a man with b@ll$.....YOU are not.

Let your HUSBAND talk to his buddy.

Seriously......talk to your own husband about it and see what HE thinks rather than taking to this forum here.

Have you spoken to your husband and have you gotten his perspective???

I honestly don't believe you have.....so go and do that and then proceed with your next step.

But really, he's your husband's old schoolmate.......not yours.......don't try to play "hero" here.

??? · Answer

You see too little of their situation to judge his wife's behavior. Mind your own fvcking business.

i + i · Answer

I think you shouldn't 
stick your nose in it.

Marriage / Divorce / Should I ask my neighbour? - Delicate Question?

5 Answers