sophia f

I ordered a double memory foam and it arrived vacuum packed.It looks too small (especially in width), can anyone tell me what the size is when it is vacuum packed as I haven't taken it out of the packet yet just in case I need to return it....

I am looking at buying a camcorder, and have seen that the new ones have resolutions of 1080p, 720p and 1080i etc??

What are the differences in quality between these and the old ones, say 0.3mp?

How do I work out which camera is better

I am looking to buy a digital SLR and have found it for the cheapest price on SLR hut. Has anyone every purchased one from them. What was your experience with it? I have seen some online reviews which are saying that they are not in fact real etc...

I am looking to buy a canon eos 1100d. But a Kiss X50 and a Canon T3 keep being recommended. What is the difference between the 3?

Hi guys and gals!

I have purchased a domain name from 123 reg - now I don't know what to do? How can I create a website with several different pages for free? Also what is this about hosting etc and everything else - I am sooooo confused! HELP! Not too complex please!

Hi,

I am travelling to China in 3 weeks and will visit Beijing and Hong Kong amongst other places. Does anyone know anywhere good where I can get dental braces or invisalign braces? Also does anyone know the cost too?

what is a good website for sharing weight loss tips and progress with other users in the uk. I would also like one where you can monitor your weight by selecting what you have eaten in the day and what exercise you have done. Is there one thats the most popular in the UK?

I am going camping around Malaysia and Indonesia (Sumatra, Java, Bali). I was wondering whether anybody has ever done this and could give me some info about it. Also If you know any campsites in Malaysia, or Indonesia, could you post the websites please.

I have a toshiba equium a100-027 laptop with vista and I was trying to fix the sound of my microphone in the control panel and now my sound doesn't work anymore! I dont know whats wrong with it, 5 minutes ago the sound was fine.

I found a baby bird in my garden, it looks only days old and cannot yet fly. I am living in Thailand and there are many cats which come into my garden. The cats will kill it. I tried to find the nest but i can't and there is no vet service etc i can take it to. What can i do to help it survive. I dont know the breed?

I am going to all the above countries. I hope to spend a year in Asia with my boyfriend and was wondering how much we would need for a year moneywise. We stay in cheap hotels and eat resonably cheaply and dont only go to the tourist resorts. We get goverment buses too. We do smoke though and we drink. We are planning to only spend a couple of weeks in malaysia and the rest of the year everywhere else.

Can anyone give us any idea on how much we will need to take?

I am going to all the above countries. I hope to spend a year in Asia with my boyfriend and was wondering how much we would need for a year moneywise. We stay in cheap hotels and eat resonably cheaply and dont only go to the tourist resorts. We get goverment buses too. We do smoke though and we drink. We are planning to only spend a couple of weeks in malaysia and the rest of the year everywhere else.

Can anyone give us any idea on how much we wll need to take?

A woman found out that her husband was cheating on her while stationed in Saudi Arabia a few months ago. So she sends him a care package.

He is excited to get a package from his wife back home. He finds that it contains a batch of home made cookies and a VHS tape of his favorite TV shows.

He invites a couple of his buddies over and they're all sitting around having a great time eating the cookies and watching some episodes of South Park. Right in the middle of one episode the tape cuts to a home video of his wife on her knees sucking his best friend's dick.

After a few seconds, he does his business in her mouth and she turns and spits the load right into the mixing bowl of cookie dough. She then looks at the camera and says, "By the way, I want a divorce."

Now THAT'S a Dear John letter!

How to Shower Like a Woman:

1. Take off fourteen layers of clothing you put on this morning. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing robe and towel on head. If you happen to see husband along the way, ignore juvenile "turban-head" jokes and run to bathroom. 3. Look at womanly physique in mirror and stick out stomach so as to complain about how fat you're getting. 4. Turn on hot water only. 5. Get in the shower, once you've found it through all the steam. 6. Look for facecloth, armcloth, legcloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone. 7. Wash hair once with cucumber and lemon shampoo with 83 added vitamins. 8. Rinse hair. Condition your hair with cucumber and lemon conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes. 9. Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red and raw. 10. Try to wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Java Cake bodywash. 11. Complain bitterly when you realize that your husband has once again been EATING your ginger nut and java cake body wash. 12. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen minutes, as you must make sure that all the conditioner has come off). 13. Debate shaving armpits and legs and decide that you can't be bothered. 14. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you get a rush of cold water. 15. Turn hot water on full and rinse off. 16. Dry with a towel the size of a small African country.

******************************

How to Shower Like a Man:

1. Sit on the edge of the bed and take off the underwear you've walking around the house in all morning. Leave them on the floor. 2. Walk to bathroom wearing a towel. If you see your wife along the way, flash her. 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Pat your beer belly with affection as if it was a great achievement. Suck in your gut to see if you have pecs. (No.) 4. Turn on the water. 5. Check for pecs again. (Still no.) 6. Get in the shower. 7. Don't bother to look for a washcloth. (You don't use one.) 8. Spend 5 minutes soaping your body and rinse. 9. Spend 15 minutes washing your crotch and surrounding area. 10. Wash your rear end. 11. Shampoo your hair, do not use conditioner. 12. Make a shampoo mohawk. 13. Open the door and look at yourself in the mirror, giggle. 14. Pee. 15. Repeat #9, because it felt good. 16. Rinse off and get out of the shower. 17. Pick up the towel and sniff it. If it smells okay, go ahead and dry off with it. If it doesn't smell okay, holler to your wife to find you a clean one. 18. Return to the bedroom wearing the towel, if you pass your wife, flash her.

On the first day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's a kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty years and I'll give back the other forty."

And God agreed.

On the second day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give back the other ten."

So God agreed (sigh).

On the third day God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty year life span." Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?"

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you twenty years."

Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten dog gave back and the ten monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"

"Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."

So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, have sex, enjoy, and do nothing; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit in front of the house and bark at everybody.

Four men got together to play golf one sunny morning. As they were heading out to the course, one of them was detained by a phone call.

The other three were discussing their children while walking to the first tee.

"My son," said one proudly, "has made quite a name for himself in the home building industry. He began as a carpenter, but now owns his own design and construction firm. He's so successful, in fact in the last year he was able to give a good friend a brand new home as a gift."

The second man, not to be outdone, boasts how his son began his career as a car salesman, but now owns a multi-line dealership. "He's so successful, in fact, in the last six months he gave a friend two brand new cars as a gift."

The third man brags that his son has worked his way up through a stock brokerage firm, and has become so successful that in the last few weeks has given a good friend a large stock portfolio as a gift.

As the fourth man arrives at the tee box, the three smugly tell him that they have been discussing how successful their progeny are, and ask what line of work his son is in.

"To tell the truth, I'm not very pleased how my son has turned out," he replies. "For fifteen years, he's been a hairdresser, and I've just recently discovered he's gay."

As the other three recoil in horror, he continues, "but on the bright side, he must be good at what he does, because his last three boyfriends have given him a brand new house, two new cars, and a big stock portfolio."

A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir." The driver says, "Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating."

Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: "Now don't be silly, dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control."

As the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, "Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?"

The wife smiles demurely and says, "You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did." As the officer makes out the second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, "Darn it, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?"

The officer frowns and says, "And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine."

The driver says, "Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket."

The wife says, "Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving."

And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, "WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??"

The officer looks over at the woman and asks, "Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?"

"Only when he's been drinking"

What is the most important thing in your life that if it didn't exist you'd want to die as your life would have no meaning?

One time, an Italian, a French, and a Colombian all died and met each other in heaven. They were all decent people so God told them that they could all get a second chance to live again, under one condition: If they did the thing that they liked to do the most, they would instantly be brought back to heaven. The guys all thought that it was a sweet deal and accepted and thanked God.

When they got back to Earth, they talked and they found out what eachother's favorite thing to do was. The Italian loved to eat pizza. The French loved to touch money. And the Colombian loved to have sex.

As they continued talking, the Italian saw a pizzeria right in front of them. He couldn't resist himself and he ran, grabbed a slice of pizza, bit into it and *poof* he disaperared. The French and the Colombian didn't worry much about it and they just started walking down the street together.

The French saw something shiny on the ground and realized that it was a coin. He quickly bent down to grab

A Fairy told a married couple: "For being an exemplary married couple for 25 years I will give you each a wish" "I want to travel around the world with my dearest husband" said the wife. The Fairy moved her magic stick and abracadabra! Two tickets appeared on her hands. Now was the husband's turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well... ... this moment is very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime. So.... I'm sorry my love, but....my wish is...to have a wife 30 years younger than me" The wife was deeply disappointed but, a wish was a wish. The Fairy made a circle with her magic stick and.... abracadabra! ......suddenly the husband was 90 years old.